Rainy Random Wednesday

Okay I have no explanation for the randomness below 
other than the fact that I love each picture and didn't
want to split it up into 5 different posts, 
so here they are collaborated into one.
all images © Chestnut Tree Photography
...
Do you ever feel like you have mounds of books
to read and you can't decide which way to go so
you start reading all 8 of them at once?
I've reached this point and it's absolutely
overwhelming
Oh, and lets add to the mix that I
got a Kindle for Christmas. So all I want to do
is read on that and forget about my pile of paperbacks.
What a dilemma!


Thankful.

Today I am thankful for skype.


It's a wonderful thing and should be thanked accordingly.
So, thank you skype.
Thank you for letting me see Mr while he works far away.


Even though you are grainy and warbly at times,you still come through
because I can still see Mr through the pix-elated screen and it makes me happy. This was our means of communication a short while ago, 
but thanks to you skype, now I see his face.



I understand at times you freeze and our connection fails,
but that's okay b/c Mr's face is frozen on the screen and he always looks cute. 
So, thanks even still. 






If we had coffee..

I'd ask you to listen.

I'd tell you things you might not expect. Not from a girl who appears so strong. I'd tell you that sometimes being honest with yourself relieves something deep down inside. I'd tell you I'm scared and lonely, but don't want your sympathy. You might offer it anyway, but I wouldn't be asking for it. I'd tell you it's hard, really hard and I don't always want to do it. But then I'd tell you I have a husband whose completely worth it. You might be thinking, "you signed up for this." I'll kindly remind you, I did not. I simply fell in love and three years later he signed.. but I still loved. So no, I did not sign up for this. But once again, I would remind you he is worth it. I'd tell you that sometimes I forget to pray. God kindly reminds me He's there though, even when I forget. I'd tell you about my photography and how I get lost behind my lens. Even further, how it brings me happiness and a peace of mind when I can't hardly get through a day, and the joy it brings me when people believe I have a talent. You might be tired of listening to me talk by now, but I'd still need you to listen. I'd tell you how you don't understand..even though you aren't really supposed to. I'd tell you twelve months is a long time, and I'm terrified of them even though we'll make it through better people. I'd tell you that it's real. The pain is real, and the love is real. Once more, I'd remind you he is worth it. I'd tell you I feel vulnerable for admitting these things. I'd ask you to pray for me. It's the only thing I can hold on to. I'd tell you I'm not emotional and rarely cry. Even during this time, when I feel like I should cry, I don't (at least not often). But it still hurts and it's still real. There's still days I don't want to wake up or get dressed.  But, I'd tell you I'm proud, so totally and completely proud. Although I'm all those other things, nothing out weighs how proud I am of my husband.

I'd thank you for listening. 
But, that's only if we had coffee..


Love Birds

This is Josh and Cate.
My brother's best friend and girlfriend.
I happen to think they're adorable.
Cate loves photography, like myself.
  Josh loves Civil Engineering.(how collegiate)
Oh, they also love each other.

all images © Chestnut Tree Photography


My Day In Pictures

Here is what my camera lens saw today. 
all images © Chestnut Tree Photography


What's on my celly?

Hello all! 
Time for another Tuesday Link-Up of..
Do you want in on the fun? 
Go here to find out more.

The week started out at my Grandparent's house.
I went over there with my parents and we ate dinner,
listened to stories about their childhood, looked at old pictures
and sat by this warm, amazing fire.
(it was much bigger earlier in the night)
I never want to forget nights like this with my grandparents.
It truly makes my heart warm and happy.

Switching gears a bit...
I found this while shopping and sent the picture to Mr.
I felt it was appropriate given our current situation?
I mean he fits the role just perfectly.
;)

'Scuse  the blur.
I bought these sexy shoes for my Mr. 
He's coming home for Christmas 
and I think I remember him saying he wanted to take me on a hot date?
hmmmm...
did I emphasis enough that
MY MR WILL BE HOME FOR CHRISTMAS! :)

Mojitos do the trick sometimes.

Notice
  • head wrap
  • mittens
  • big fluffy thing to put already mittened hands inside of that should only be used in the snow
  • scarf
  • pink ugg boots
I think she forgot she was in California?

The death of me...
You get to have free candy samples in this store.
No I did not stuff hand-fulls in my purse!
(Okay, everyone does it)

cotton candy
my favorite.


Our first married Christmas present
was given to us this week.
:)
 It was more of our urberly amazing, cute China.

This heart leaf was on the ground at the gas station.
I fell in love with how Jesus can remind us of his love
in the smallest of ways, when we least expect it.


I started to design a new logo for my photography
Came up with two, but I'm still playing.
 
This is the one I'm leaning toward.

 Thanks for checking out what's on my phone!
To see what's on everyone elses phone this week,
go over to The Lowe Family News and check out her link.

...


Happy Tuesday Linking!




Christmas Goodness

Christmas time!
It's bitter-sweet for me this year.
Mr will be home for Christmas, but only for a short while.
So
with Christmas quickly approaching, 
it's also one day closer to yet, another goodbye. 
But
I'm truly beyond stoked to spend such a special time with my love.
I have never been this excited for Christmas before.
And let me tell you how excited I get on the average Christmas..
I'm the type to decorate the day after Thanksgiving.
There's no procrastinating allowed in this home.
I adore everything Christmas-y..
Christmas lights
ornaments
seasonal Starbucks cups
stockings
Christmas movies
hot cocoa
fires in the fireplace
and yes,
Christmas music :)
all of it brings me back to childhood and it never gets old.
I love taking a drive to see Christmas lights around town.
It's the most wonderful time of the year!
It's hard spending almost the entire season with out my husband,
but
My countdown to Mr.'s arrival 
has officially begun!





Cafe Terrace at Night

This picture has always fascinated me. The color and setting grab me, and send me into an imaginative dream. As I sit in Cafe Terrace at Night with Mr, I sip on my latte and watch the people pass us by. After we're done sipping on something warm and French, we take a walk down the cobblestone road. Little children pass us by, they laugh and giggle while they chase after each other. We'll talk about having kids of our own someday. Our children, they'll be whimsical and creative..like their Mommy and Daddy. But that's another dream in itself. After our strole around the cobblestone town, we'll go home, to a quaint little place we call our own, with a terrace and all.
Daydreaming gets the best of me from time to time.
But what does it hurt?
For a just little while, I lived in France and had my
very own terrace in a cobblestone town. :)

I wished you away..

I remember sitting in Mr.'s room on New Years Eve, thinking how I wish 2010 never existed. Eleven days after the new year I was supposed to say bye to my love for the next 7 months. Not something I looked forward to. It scared me to be on my own for 7 months, so I just wished the year would jump forward and maybe not even exist. I had no idea what was in store for the year I had wished away. Little did I know it would be the most transforming year of my life and those 7 months would turn into the least of my concern. 

-Mr. left for basic training 11 days after the New Year.  



-Mr. suggested I move to the East Coast while he finished up his AIT school.



-I dove into my love for photography and began doing shoots.



-I bought a new car and drove across the country.



-I moved to the East Coast.



-I took a semester off of school.

-I got engaged.


-I planned a wedding in 4 months with the help of my Mommy.



-I moved out.

-I got married.


-I got a new job and then quit my new job.

-My husband deployed. 


And to think, the first day of 2010, I wished the whole year never existed. I would have missed out on God's ultimate plan for my life. I grew up a lot this past year. I've lived on my own, driven thousands of miles to be with the one I love, and then married this man. It's incredible to look back on all the hardships and know we've made it through and come out stronger people. People have talked, rumors have flown but that doesn't change where I'm at in my life. This is my life..I'm happy, driven and letting God mold my life to His perfect plan for me. I'd like to wish away 2011, but who knows what this year holds. It might mean I wished away another milestone, another "best day of my life." So I'll go in with an open mind. 2010 made me stronger and 2011 will do the same. 



Deployment Weekend

He is there and I am here
Those last 10 days came and went, just like I knew they would.
Still, some part of me feels like it's just a joke.
I'm going to come home late one night and Mr will answer the door,
he'll tell me he was just kidding and that he won't be going there, not now, 
not ever.
We'll stay up late, maybe bicker for a minute about whether we're going to watch 
American Chopper or Grey's Anatomy re-runs. 
We'll settle on Two and a Half Men though, because that's what we do.
Mr will fall asleep, but try really hard to stay up late with me
(because he knows I love it when he does).
But he'll fall asleep anyway, on accident usually, and I'll read my book.  
Every now and then I'll look at Mr and get butterflies 
knowing we belong to each other.
Everyone says babies are peaceful and most lovable when they sleep,
well, so are husbands
and sometimes, seeing him sleep so peacefully..
that's when I remember just how much I love him.

...

2 days before Mr and I took off for the big weekend, 
we were sitting on the couch and Mr's Dad text him.
I don't know what that text said but after he read it, he looked at me and said
it's here. 
My heart sank down lower than I'd ever felt.
We acknowledged it, the unspoken, the topic weighing on our minds since 
April 13th, a date that I will never forget. 
Deployment had arrived, and it came unfashionably on time. 
How selfish, rude and stupid of Deployment to do that!
After hearing those words it took everything in me not to curl up in bed 
and stay there for days.
I put on my big girl face and sucked it up.

 ...
We arrived at the hangar nice and early so Mr could get his bags in line 
and have their first formation.
I felt like I was handing Mr over to the care of someone else 
once he ran into formation.
From that point on, the Government owned him, and that scared me. 
General..Commander..Sergeant So-and-So, 
take care of my Mr and don't yell at him!
After formation we had a small window of free-time, so we took a pointless drive. 
After our short window of a break, we decided to follow the rules and go back, 
so Mr could get in.. yet, another formation. 
A BBQ also awaited us, so we had some motivation.
 
It was so moving to see this deploying group of soldiers 
in one, very large formation.
I remember standing by myself in awe at all of the men & women  
voluntarily fighting for my freedom. 
My husband stood beside those men and women. 
After the formation and BBQ 
we were free for the remainder of the night.
...

Day Two was the Yellow Ribbon Ceremony Day.
Throughout most of the ceremony
I listened to the speakers and it was fine.
I appreciated the General addressing family members and so on.
But, when it came time to call out the mobilization of Mr's unit, 
my heart beat out of my chest.
There's something about a man in uniform 
calling out orders from the President of the United States,
(and knowing that it was directed toward my husband)
that brings chills to anyone listening.
Here are a few pictures from the ceremony.








Once the ceremony came to a close Mr and I were given the rest of the day to do what we pleased.
I was so happy to have that last night with Mr.
We laughed, we held hands, we joked, we made memories.
found this awesome car in the Target parking lot.
who doesn't want Yoda to ride shot gun?


...

 Deployment day arrived. 
The countdowns were over. 
The anticipation was gone.
It was here.


It became real once we arrived to the hangar/air field. 
Families stood around taking pictures and holding on to their loved ones.
It was then that I realized deployment is hard for
more than just the spouse.
Young kids were holding on so tight to their Mommies and Daddies.
I felt like I could relate to these children though.
Almost like, if I started pouring my heart out to one of them..
they would listen..and know.
So I thought to my self,
If these children can do this I can do this.
I'm bigger, stronger, older..and wiser...right? 
But deep down inside I wanted to get on their level.
I wanted to kick and scream and not let go.
That wasn't an option though and,
I thought it'd be best if I didn't create a scene.
Nearly an hour and a half after we arrived it was time for Mr to line up. 
We said our goodbye,
I squeezed him with all I could
told him I loved him
and that was it.
Then he made his way through the crowd to find his place in line.
I watched him run out there.
I pushed my way through the crowd, right to the front.
I didn't take my eyes off of him the entire time.
The tears came out hard,
but I could still see a blurry Mr among all of those ACUs. 
A nice lady decided to give me a tissue and ask a little about
who I was sending off and if it was our first time, etc. 
She put her arm around me and made me feel less alone
for a few minutes.
So, thank you lady..whoever you are.
Before I knew it, every soldier had loaded onto the plane, but not without turning and waving goodbye to all of their loved ones below.
Mr told me what seat he was in.
He told me to get to the front of the crowd so he could see me.
At this point, I felt like my body was running out of energy and I was so exhausted from everything,
my mind was going crazy trying to comprehend what was happening.
Not much can prepare you for watching your whole life take off into the sky..
with out you.
But it came and went, just like those 10 days.
One minute we were in each others arms and the next
he was in the sky and out of reach.
I didn't take my eyes off that plane until it disappeared into the sky.
Once the plane was gone there was a rush of people.
I felt so out of place and just needed to get out of there.
So I did.

...
I miss my husband more than I can explain.
It's hard to put into words.
I get asked that question almost daily now.
"How is...that going for you?"
Well, to answer that question for you,

it's going...

I'm here, he's there

and...it's going.


Come home safe to me Mr.
I'm waiting.

<3