Nicole Dianne: stream of consciousness

I have been reminded this week of all the many precious people in my life.

Nothing life altering took place, but it's special when you experience Jesus through other people.

It's in these experiences that I've been challenged to refocus and recommit to becoming a better version of myself and the person I want to be. It's easy to get caught up in selfishness and forget that my purpose is rooted in showing the love of Christ to people. Thinking back to all the many ways I've lost focus of that both saddens me and pushes me to a better place of knowing who and what I want to represent, and all of the ways I can achieve becoming a better me.

I want to be present when I'm with friends and family. I want to ask questions, engage in conversation and I want others to do the same. I want to forget where my phone is and remember the next morning, and not care about catching up with the social media missed in between. I want to read more books and look at less screens. I want to define the things that matter to me most in life, and forget about the rest. I don't want to be concerned with what I am "supposed" to value, or what's "standard for the industry." I want the things that I value to be the standard for my decisions. I want more real and less Pinterest.

I'm not super interested in the life that social media and blogs have created. That's not to say that a beautifully curated coffee shop image doesn't inspire me, but I think there's a fine line that is often crossed when defining reality vs. inspiration. Blogs, Pinterest, and Instagram offer some amazing inspiration for beautiful living, elaborate weddings, and special memories, but they have also created this alternate reality of square-ready vignettes, easily cropping out the real life happening just inches away.

I am interested in pursuing a life with less social media, less criticism, and more tangible moments with uplifting conversation.

And speaking of less screens, I'm off to read a book!

Starting blog posts has never been my strong point, I feel like the intros are always a bit awkward and clumsily put together, so I'll dive in.

These last couple of months have been a fair competition of bad and good, exhaustion followed by reward and stressful situations squashed down by moments of humble understanding. I've felt God speak clearly to the notion that He>I time and time again. It's a wonderful realization when you understand there is One greater than you and I who sets the world in order. I tried controlling a lot of circumstances this Summer, and I'm still finding my place in that battle with God. But I rest in knowing His plans out-do mine 100% of the time.

I'm usually a Summer kind of gal, I thrive on the sunny days, cool nights and BBQs with friends. But I'm also big on "new seasons, new months, new years" and the idea that a fresh slate accompanies each. I need that new slate right now, I want to throw control in God's hands from the start and thrive because I've done it His way and not mine. The approaching slate? Pumpkin spice lattes, homey scented candles, big sweaters, and the promise of the Holidays. Fall, I covet your grand appearance.

So, Summer...

There have been a lot of happy things among the crazy so far.

Things like greenery in my home, and blue skies every day.

A trip to Tahoe with my sweet family

to include: a family reunion, daily beach trips, a dinner on the lake, lots of games, hiking Eagle Rock with my love, great food, a fancy night spent by an outdoor fire pit and delicious drinks, and a walk through the cutest local nursery. Because it's not a trip until I've satisfied the 60 year old lady in me by perusing the aisles of perennials.

Summer AAA baseball games at our local team's stadium.

My brother works for the local team and often gives our family tickets to go see them play. I've grown up going to these games but it amps up the fun when I see my little brother running around on the field. I've yet to catch a free t-shirt from the "t-shirt launch gun" he shoots out at the audience. Hmmph ;)

A night at the State Fair with one of my best friends.

I was invited by a friend to join her at the state fair last week and it was so great. The best part? All she wanted to do was look at animals and go to exhibits just like me. Rides are fun at permanent parks, not 14 day pop-up fairs...I'm not trying to sign my life away for 30 seconds of "spin you upside-down, jerk you in circles until you throw-up" fun. Oh, and her sister worked in the animal nursery with all the little babies so that was super fun to see as well!

A ton of photography work and also new succulents.

Photography has picked up SO much these last couple of months, it's incredible to see God pouring out His blessings on this business He allowed me to have. I've worked harder on this than anything in my life and I'm finally seeing the fruits of my labor. However, I don't want to get caught up in myself and thinking I'm awesome so I'll just throw it out there again that God is the awesome one who gave me the coolest stinking job ever, and I'm forever grateful.

Also, succulents...they are cool. I love them and I will never have enough.