celly unleashed

It's been a while since I dumped my celly files on you tootsie pops

so today is the day.

Let's get the ball rollin with 

my spectacalies.

I'm told they make me look collegiate.

Pshh..

You know what else makes me look collegiate?

Buying beer

teddy grahams

and chocolate milk.

I can assure you..

it helps with your studies

 take my word for it

I have excellent grades

Do you know what else is collegiate?

And by collegiate I mean, not really collegiate.

insex.

get it? 

(I don't want to explain this one to you so just catch on..k?) 

Grandpa couldn't understand the concept

of looking into a phone for a picture.

what the heck?

It's like he's from the 50's..

Did you catch diabetes and clogged arteries 

just from looking at this too?

Hair twins.

There's an art to parting bangs.

I felt too safe driving behind the floating ladder

so I switched lanes.

And just so you're aware..

my dad and brother were ninjas or something 7 years ago.